What makes a Food Porridge?

por|ridge pronunciation: /ˈpɒrɪdʒ

[mass noun]chiefly British A dish consisting of oatmeal or another meal or cereal boiled in water or milk.

 Why am I writing a post on porridge? Don’t ask me because I don’t know. Where did I get the super incredible idea for this post? I know the answer to this one. Well, here is what happened…
I was late for work that morning so I packed something which I would eat when I got to the office. When I got to the office, I started munching away as soon as I could. The earlier I eat it, the lesser the risk of my colleagues seeing me and asking to share. Yes I think like a child when it comes to food. Don’t blame me, blame my tongue, throat and that guy called stomach.
While I was eating this plate of sweet something, my boss walked in. He looked at me and smiled. Half way into his office he asks me, “are you eating kekefa?” I’m like, “sorry?” He rephrases and says, “are you eating porridge plantain?” I was like, “yes o!” He was like “can you cook?” I was like, “I can cook food that you’ll eat to survive, you know nothing too special.” You all know how office small talk is.
That was when it hit me, why did he call “kekefa” porridge plantian? Okay, yes I didn’t know that “kekefa” was the name Bayelsans call this kind of food but this was not in anyway a porridge [check definition above]. I remembered an episode of Barney and Friends where they re-enacted the story of the 3 bears and that little white girl who missed her way. You know the story right? Well, what they called porridge was oats, ugly looking white coloured oats.
So what makes a Nigerian dish Porridge?
For those of  you who don’t know. We have a few types of porridge that I can remember:
 * Plantain Porridge
* Yam Porridge
 * Beans Porridge
 * Cocoyam Porridge
If you have invented a new one, do let me know.
porridge plantain, yam and beans

I took the time to create a table of the similar ingredients used in making Nigerian porridges. Yes I am bored at work. Yes I TOOK TIME to create this horrible table.  All I’m saying is that these foods have almost the same type of ingredients. But it still doesn’t answer the question of why we call them porridge. Honestly I don’t know why, maybe its because we mash them up after they are done. Maybe it is just British influence and the need to have an English name for everything. I don’t know. What do you think?

Should we just say it is Nigerian English?

 p.s: I had to use the oxford online dictionary version because I wasn’t trained to use that woman’s dictionary. You know, that Marriam lady. Why should I use hers when I was punished in secondary school any day I forgot to carry my super heavy OXFORD ADVANCED LEARNERS DICTIONARY to school? Thank you British people.

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