Who do we Blame?

I’ve been a little bit apprehensive about doing a post on the recent rape of a 23 year, old lady which ultimately led to her death.

This is what I think about it and anybody who reads this, is absolutely free to disagree with my opinions.

An adult female, on her way home with a friend, got into the wrong bus. She got raped by six men and then raped again when these men used a rod to rape her and then she was thrown off a moving bus. She was not alone, she was with a friend.

I would love to say that I didn’t get much details of this news after she was flown to Singapore because my neighbour stopped the newspaper boy from supplying newspapers. Why does that affect me you might ask, well, every morning I wake up before my neighbour and read his newspaper for him because I just feel that it’ll make me wake up earlier and get ready for college. So after an argument my neighbour had with the newspaper boy, the newspapers stopped coming. I have no idea what they said in Hindi but I have a feeling it has to do with my flat number.

The Indian media said she was with a male “friend”. I have a problem with this “friend” thing:

1. The guy was not her friend, he was her boyfriend. I have no idea why they refused to say that he was her boyfriend. Why was it so hard to admit it? God! He was her boyfriend.

2. They don’t know how many dates and how much rupees that guy spent before she actually accepted to be his girlfriend.

3. They just downgraded him to a mere “friend” for no reason! ughh! Now back to something important-

I just think we should ask ourselves a few questions, and then maybe when we get the answers right, we can move on…

Do we say that the men who rape women are the uneducated majority?

Do we say it is the women’s fault because they wear clothes they feel comfortable in?

Do we blame a society that believes the men are always right, therefore they can do whatever they want?

Do we blame India and not Bharath?

Do we blame men who cannot control their sexual desires?

Do we blame men who have these sexual desires because their women are conservative?

Do we say the mothers of these men did not teach them to respect other women who could as well be their sisters, wives or even mothers?

Do we blame the movies we watch?

Do we blame our police because they never do anything about it and the offenders go free?

Do we blame religion?

Do you blame it on the woman because she never asked for mercy while being raped?

Do we believe that things are meant to be this way since our politicians can rape too?


I do not have the answers to these questions, so if you do please sound them off in the comments.

My friend and I were taking a stroll down a main road, about a fortnight ago. We were deep in our conversation talking about boys and love and fairytale weddings and all those stupid things young girls dream about.
Then out of nowhere, she gets a hard spank on her buttocks. We were in shock for a few seconds. Words cannot express the state of shock we were in, it was like everything stopped for some seconds. Our eyes wide open, we didn’t know what had just happened.
One of three guys on a speeding bike had hit her while we were walking. If they respected her they would have done no such thing. It wouldn’t even occur to them to hit a woman on her buttocks just for fun.
Then a little fear did set in, what if this happens every time we take a walk? What if we get hit with a rod next time and then we die? All those silly thoughts are just part of the whole package of disrespectful Indian men.
I repeat, the disrespectful men, not all men are the same and Nigerian men are not saints.

The truth is, most Indian men have no respect for women. If you read this as an Indian man, I urge you to RESPECT your women. I don’t mean allowing your Indian chick to slap you at the mall where everyone can see. No! that is not respecting her! You see, Indian women are beautiful creatures, Indian mothers have the most caring of hearts and Indian wives are just like every other nagging wife out there. Yours is no different. Do not Disrespect her.

Respecting her is respecting her wishes, believing that she has a right to be who she wants to be, where she wants to be and at any frigging time she wants. Why? Because she is her own self, she does not in any shape or form belong to you, she is not owned by you. By respecting her, I mean not imposing what you feel is right on her and if she disagrees, beat her to a pulp. I truly don’t know how to explain the respect thing.

If a politician respects women he would not say “rape of grown-up girls and women might be understandable but sexual assault on a minor was a heinous crime.”

If you respect your women, you would not use public protest as an “opportunity to grope women”.

We can blame illiteracy and we can also say everyone has morals that they try to live up to. Do you think defiling another man’s future wife is nothing?  If you do, you should be checked into a psychiatric hospital.

While the protests were going on in Delhi, a woman was raped and then a little girl in jaipur.

Somewhere else, a woman jumped off a moving train to avoid being raped. Come on people! We can do better than this. We have hearts don’t we? We know right from wrong. Let us fight for change in this beautiful nation we call our own…I mean India.

In pidgin English, Nigerians would ask “Dear Indians wetin dey worry you?”

I’m not sorry if I sound feminist. Yup! I’m one of those feminist people, but I’ll get married someday.

If you want to know the meaning, Google it.


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